I meditated last night during yoga and found myself standing with deep lush green foliage all around me to chest height.  I could feel the humidity in the air and smell the damp decaying leaves on the forest floor, and I could hear water splashing in the distance.  I brushed the huge leaves aside and trudged through the undergrowth for awhile, and I marvelled at how serene this place felt to me.  I heard birds calling in the distance, but there was no sense of hurry or alarm in the air at all, so I slowly walked along and enjoyed  the peace and relaxation I had been offered.

As I drew closer to the splashing sounds I came upon a clearing that contained a beautiful waterfall, and I recognized it as a place I had visited earlier in my journeys.  This time things looked a bit different though, so I stepped into the clearing to find out what had changed.  The moment I cleared the foliage and stood in the clearing I noticed that I was barefoot and only wearing a small swimsuit  and my bracelet.  I felt a bit confused, but then it occured to me that I was supposed to use my senses and feel everything around me instead of being enclosed safely in clothes.

That thought made me wonder what was in store for me, but I was determined to experience whatever came my way, so I stepped forward and looked around me.  The first thing I noticed was that the whole area was teeming with life.  Tiny creatures scuttled and scurried over the rocks and grasses beneath my feet, and I confess I was a bit unsettled at the thought of them scurrying up me as well.  I remembered vividly the pain and itch of ant and other various insect bites I had incurred, but since I was so scantily dressed for a reason I stayed where I was and took some deep breaths to ease my fears.  It would be very sad to miss a learning experience because I was afraid of insects, so I stepped forward and did something I would never have dreamed of until recently. 

I sat down on a nearby rock and put my hands on the ground beside me, and I instantly flashed back to my childhood.  I used to play with spiders, poisonous snakes, the neighborhood vicious German  Shepherd dog, and any other animal that came my way.  I was terrified of wasps due to a traumatic incident that involved several stings, but otherwise they were all friends and never once hurt me at all.  I remember my mother’s expression upon finding me holding black widow spiders or snakes and holding conversations with them, and I am surprised she didn’t faint from fear.  I realized how far I had come and how the circle was almost complete when I realized a spider was making its way up my left arm and ants were climbing over my right foot on their way to wherever they were going.

I watched the spider climb up to my elbow and then put out my right hand for it to sit where I could see it, and when she (I felt this was a female and she did appear to be one) was safely perched on my hand I held her up so I could see her better.  I got an instant sensation of becoming acquainted with her and smiled at the familiar feeling.  I remembered feeling this as a child, and I realized (or perhaps she told me) that my next journey was to be rediscovering myself so I could discover the rest of the universe.  Children come into this world equipped to absorb, learn, and connect with everything around them, but most of us are taught or traumatized into separating and forgetting that wonderful connection and those amazing gifts that are natural to living creatures.  The next part of my journey is to be finding that open and childlike part of myself so I can experience the wonders all around me with the eyes of a child and knowledge of my adulthood. 

As I was absorbing this idea and wondering how I would accomplish this mission I noticed that the lady spider was gone and I was alone in the clearing.  I felt a bit disappointed, so I stood and walked to the waterfall that I had found so comforting during my last journey here.  I stepped under the falls and into the cleansing streams of water, and I felt my disappointment wash away with the cool water.  The next thing I knew I was opening my eyes and sitting up at the end of yoga class, and I found myself smiling at the thought of finding myself with the help of all the creatures that had surrounded me my life.

This entry was posted on Saturday, March 21st, 2009 at 1:58 pm and is filed under Journeys. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.